How To Be Good
I am not a salesman. I was not put on Earth, if there is indeed a reason why we are, to sell things. This was demonstrated several years ago, painfully, when I went for an induction at a call centre. They told us that we were to sell products in a “clandestine” way. What they meant was that we should try and charm the customers and then, slowly but surely, drop subtle hints which would get THEM to ask US questions about how they could buy stuff they would never usually consider buying. By doing that we would appear friendlier and less like the money grabbing mercenaries that we clearly were. Except it didn’t work, of course, because I was too charming. All that happened every time I dialled someone was a friendly conversation. I remember a particularly nice old lady who went by the name of Mildred. We had a very nice chat about the state of her gammy legs, bless her. So I was fired, and it suited me. I really needed the article at Enigin Sales. If I would have read it back then then I am sure I could have got Mildred to buy many things she didn’t need and couldn’t have used, like a jet ski and turbo-powered rollerblades. Because selling is an ART, you see. It’s all about having the right virtues. If you don’t have them then you may as well not bother. And the article certainly makes sense: selling, when done properly, can be good for the buyer. This is something I am sure to tell my old would-be boss at the call-centre should we ever meet again…
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